Dating isn’t just for two people anymore. Wait, what?! Don’t worry, I’m not proposing a menage a trois here, unless you’re into that, no judgement. What I’m talking about is a one person relationship, and it’s by far the most influential relationship in your life. The relationship you have with yourself.
Dating yourself is one of the most important things you can do for your mind and for self care, and it can help boost confidence, self love, and acceptance. Dating yourself can be both literal and figurative, but both methods let you worship yourself like the goddess that you are!
Benefits Of Dating Yourself
Why does being alone have to suck? For whatever reason, society has told us that being single tattoos a big “L” on your forehead. Maybe it was the creators of every Valentine’s Day card ever to make a pretty penny, or maybe it was that one woman who couldn’t zip up the back of her dress by herself, and swore she’d never be alone again. No matter the reason, I’m here to let you know that being alone and taking time for yourself is a good thing, and no, it doesn’t have to mean sitting on the couch, bored. Here are just some of the amazing things you can expect when you learn how to date yourself.
1. Boosts confidence
Being happy doesn’t have to depend on others. When you date yourself, you rely on you for happiness, and let’s be honest, at the end of the day, only you can make you happy. When you learn how to date yourself, doing things on your own becomes easier. Get comfortable with going out to eat by yourself and your confidence will skyrocket, get excited about doing a solo hike and watch your self esteem soar. No matter what activities you choose when you date yourself, you’ll fall into a new, fearlessness pattern of certainty.
2. Get to know yourself better
When’s the last time you took some time for you? I mean really took a deep dive introspectively to discover new passions, quirks, or pet peeves? Or certain things about yourself that are now non-existent? When you date yourself, you unearth things that you maybe didn’t know before, and taking time to recognize them will help you better navigate through life.
3. Self love
Force yourself to spend time with you. And I mean force in the strong tone that it sounds. Why? Because being alone with yourself and your thoughts can be scary, trust me I get it. Have you ever thought to yourself, “Gosh, if anyone knew what I was thinking right now…” Yeah, me too! And that’s okay! When you get over that fear of being alone with yourself, you will learn that hey, you’re not so bad! And actually, you’re pretty gosh darn amazing!
4. Personal growth
Maybe dating yourself helped you learn about your finances, maybe you took up a new language, or maybe you now know how to whip up roasted branzino that tastes like Italy! Learning how to date yourself and personal growth go hand in hand, or should I say your hand in your hand. Not sure if that even makes sense, but that’s okay, because when I started to date myself, I also learned that I’m not the best with idioms. 🤣
5. Improve relationships with others
You can’t truly know another person until you know yourself. Dating yourself isn’t just beneficial for you, it also reaps some great rewards for your current or next relationship. A healthy relationship with yourself automatically translates to a healthy relationship with others. You know what you like, what you don’t, and everything in between, perfect for picking out your next romeo. As the old adage goes, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.”
6. Self-sufficiency
”All the women, who are independent, throw your hands up at me.” Beyonce said it best ya’ll. Self-sufficiency is sexy! You don’t need a man, or woman, to accomplish everything you want to and more. I won’t lie, I still call my Dad every time my car breaks down because I have no idea what I’m doing. But when I learned how to date myself, I realized I didn’t want to have to call my Dad each time I was having car trouble, and now, I know how to change a tire! You’ll be amazed at the things you can accomplish when you prioritize self-sufficiency.
7. No compromising
I hated going to the mall with my friends. I had to stop in every store they wanted to, when really I just wanted to hit the sale at Sephora. Five hours later, I pretty much wasted my entire day. Dying to see that new movie your boyfriend thinks is cheesy and wouldn’t be caught dead buying tickets for it? Well, guess what, you date yourself, you don’t have to compromise. Go see that corn ball movie and ball your eyes out. Anything you want to do, you can do when you date yourself. The only compromises you’ll have to make, is with you!
How To Date Yourself
I’ll admit, in the past when I’ve seen people eating alone at restaurants, I felt bad for them. I mean, embarrassing right? Wrong! Tisk tisk Samantha, boy how I’ve matured. Now I look at them in envy while I’m pretending to care and nodding my head ferociously in agreement as my co-workers blab on and on at happy hour. But taking yourself out on a date at your favorite restaurant isn’t the only thing you can do to date yourself. (And kudos to you if you can do it without being glued to your cell phone!) Here are some awesome dates you can take yourself on to achieve the benefits we talked about above. Do you, take thee?
- Treat yourself—You don’t have to wait until Christmas for your S.O. to buy you that bracelet you’ve been wanting. Treat yourself to something nice, you deserve it!
- Learn something new—Envious of a friend’s painting abilities? Grab a brush and try it out! Discover your interests and learn a new skill or hobby.
- Take a break from social—After all, dating yourself is all about YOU! Don’t worry what others are up to and set your phone aside for the day.
- Write yourself a love letter—Go ahead, brag! Tell yourself how awesome you are and you’ll journey into self-love!
- Go to a restaurant, museum, or park—It really doesn’t matter where you go, just as long as it’s somewhere you enjoy!
- Dress up for yourself—Bring your sexy back! Do your hair and makeup, throw on a hot outfit, and take some pics! Trust me, you’ll love the way it makes you feel.
The Bottom Line
Experiences matter even when you do them alone. Make yourself a priority by dating yourself and you’ll soon be on the path to exploration and self discovery and bleeds self love and confidence at every turn!